Herby New Year

It’s January 1st, 2019 12:10 AM.

My phone vibrates in my pocket. One of my best friends is calling.

I answer.

“Hello,” I say.

“Happy New Year, ugly ass…” the word ugly is pronounced with an extra added emphasis on the ‘ug’, trailing off dramatically at the ‘l’ and placing little to no emphasis on the ‘y’ making it more come off more as an ‘i’. You also can hardly hear the second ‘s’ being pronounced on the word “ass”, but the phrase itself is unmistakable.  “Ug-li as”.

“Happy New Year Brother,” I laugh.

“Where ya at?” He asks.

“At the church,” I respond.

“You know we going to hell together!”


…And that ladies and gentleman, is friendship.

Hello, 2019.



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